There’s a difference between being alone and being lonely. Being alone is an act while being lonely is just a feeling. When I was in college I started to really appreciate my alone time. Granted it’s something I had to learn to accept and enjoy but eventually I did.
Learning to be alone can mean many different things to others. For me, being alone was a few things. It was being single for a few years, learning to spend time by myself and problem solving on my own.
Back in The Single Days
From the time I was about 19 until I was 21, I chose and accepted the fact that I was single. I had two serious relationships in high school so I felt I needed some time with myself. Early 20s are such formative years for growth. You learn a lot about yourself but you also make some mistakes too. Despite feeling lonely at times I really enjoyed those single years. I focused on school and getting myself to achieve goals. Plus it led to me meeting, Judd.
Quality Me Time
Being alone successfully also stemmed from learning to spend time by myself. In high school, I was so busy with dance and hanging out with my friends. Then we all went off to schools in different places. I was commuting an hour for school 4-5 days a week. My days would start at 7am and wouldn’t finish until 5pm each day. Which meant there was a lot of down time between my classes. I didn’t really know anyone those first few weeks so I had to learn to spend some time to myself.
I ate a lot of lunches by myself and eventually grew to enjoy my “me” time. I took advantage of my long morning commutes to school and enjoyed the time I had to myself. It gave me time to think and get my creative juices flowing. To this day I still enjoy an occasional solo lunch!
Solo Problem Solver
One of the hardest parts of learning to be alone was problem solving by myself. I always had a tendency to pick up the phone and call my dad when I needed help. To be honest it’s still something I am learning today! The first time I got a flat tire I had to call someone to help me change it. By the second time, I knew exactly what to do.
Problem solving can be tricky by yourself especially if it’s dealing with something you aren’t familiar with. Google and YouTube can be great resources when you need a little help solo!
There is something beautiful about learning to be alone. It takes time to get the point of fully enjoying it. I find it important still to get some quality “me” time in even as a married lady. I encourage my husband to do the same! Once you get the hang of being okay with being alone it’s refreshing!